Thanks for checking in – merry christmas. I hope you’ve all had a wonderful day with your loved ones.
This post is going to be about me (and people with the same mentality) who struggles to fit in with their surroundings. I don’t care if it’s because of how you dress, your thoughts, your dreams, how you act around people or whatever – this is for everyone.
Standing out in a crowd
There are a lot of ways to stand out in a crowd. It can be both physically and mentally different from the people around you. If you feel like you’re one of these people, I applaud you.
I’m sure there are a lot of people out there who’s like this. People who simply do not care about how or even if you stand out – as long as you’re happy with you. I’m not gonna lie – the older I get the more I don’t care either, which is quite crazy.
I’m not standing out in a major physical way – except for wearing shorts pretty much all year and not really caring about how I dress. But I’m more likely to be mentally different (not challenged, just kidding) by a lot of people. Especially, the people from my home town.
Back when I was younger, all I cared about was being like everyone else. I wasted money on specific brands to fit in, I attended parties I didn’t even wanted to go to to fit in – heck, I even changed my personality to fit in into certain crowds. It was so important to me that EVERYBODY liked me. Just the thought of having “enemies” or “haters” would’ve killed me. So, I really did everything to make sure that I was good with everyone.
Being me in a world of unlike-minded people
As I’ve gotten older – closing in on the magic 30 years old, I’ve taken a lot of distance from who I was in my younger years. I still want people to like me. The difference is now that I want people to like me for who I am and not change who I am for people to like me. I’m done with that.
I don’t really waste money on myself anymore. If I do, it’s certainly not on clothes and most certainly not on specific, expensive brands – all just to fit in. I’m done with that too.
I like to think that there are like-minded people out there. Actually, I know there is – they’re just “out there” instead of being around me.
A lot of my attention has shifted from being this party freak bartender with loads of friends to being a guy who’s now back at school. A guy who’s investing money instead of spending them on useless stuff. A guy who’s dedicated to travelling the world (I’ve been this for a while, but now I’m really focused).
I don’t party anymore. I don’t drink myself senseless every weekend anymore. Honestly, I’ve just become more financially responsible. I had to become more responsible now when I went back to school and my income was deducted by 75%.
All of this is really showing in the amount of “friends” I have now. 5-10 years ago I spent every single minute of my time trying to become more socially attractive – back then, I had so many friends and people to hang out with. Now, I have a couple of close friends but honestly, I’m mostly just by myself, people from class or with my family. I would like to have some more close friends to hang out with on a daily basis, but I’m not in a position where I can “chase” new friends as much as I’d like to.
Mixing all of this with my new hobbies and interests, I’ve lost a lot of friends. Not a lot of people are interested in investing or travelling. People my age has already bought houses, got married and even have gotten kids. I’m so far from that mindset.
I could write books about how I’ve changed. I’ve become a person who’s not afraid of doing things my way or speaking my mind – positive or negative. I’m not everyones cup of tea, and I don’t really care to be honest.
I have my issues to deal with right now and I’m focused on school and getting better after my back injury – all which takes up most of my time. But school is something I’m passionate about and I’m fully focused.
One last thing. If you’re sitting out there feeling like you don’t fit in and maybe you even think about changing who you are to be able to fit in. To that, I just want to say: Don’t do it. It’s simply not worth it. Yes, it’s good to have a lot of friends but honestly, having fewer, closer friends is always better. The friends you get from changing who you are will never stick around for long anyways.
Take care of yourself. Take care of each other. Have a wonderful day and I appreciate you for being here. Merry christmas again. Thanks.